This ham was the size of a human head. Literally. i thought I was the biggest asshole on the planet when I couldn’t find it in the freezer where she said it was.
- Mike’s brother
“
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My mom, regarding a ham which has gone missing from her refrigerator and discussion of which has dominated my afternoon.
Being home is going really great, btw.
(via hammerito)
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Sebastian is sick :(
This is Mike’s brother. I usually just creep. :)
Bas has Feline Infectious Peritonitis. A huge portion of the feline population gets it, get diarrhea and get better. A few have a genetic predisposition to it. That’s Bas. It’s actually a corona virus, similar to what causes SARS and it will likely attack his lungs. His number is off-the-charts bad, but the vet said that he’s the first cat that’s this high on the scale and isn’t showing symptoms. We’ve got to watch for belly bloat, fluid in the lungs and difficulty breathing and loss of appetite. He could go years before he deteriorates, but when he becomes symptomatic, he’s going to get bad pretty fast.
Sebastian is a really really great cat, and I appreciate the attention he gets from all of Mike’s followers. He knows he’s Internet Famous.
Thanks. ~ C
hammerito:
We found out this morning. He has a rare parasite that they can’t get rid of. His bloodwork was off-the-charts bad, but he’s asymptomatic so far. They said it will certainly shorten his lifespan and there’s nothing they can do to stop it. At least he’s feeling okay right now.
I’ll be with you during the Second Coming if you’ll be the first.
jbowesmusic:
Mike and I spent part of today coming up with rapture-related pick-up lines. I’m going to do my damnedest to use them without getting a drink thrown in my face. My personal favorite (that I came up with):
“Tomorrow at 6pm, there’s supposed to be a series of earthquakes that…
hammerito:
“So let’s see what logo you came up with for our NBA charity initiative!”
*reveals logo*
“Say, are those testicles?”
“Yep!”
“Okay great!”
Testicles with a heart-on.
hammerito:
Death Cab For Cutie // The Sound of Settling
Why does this song make me think of dying?
Oh, yeah, right.
Look, just based on the nature of the water cycle, I have to assume that at some point I’ve drunk Hitler’s pee. Not a lot, but I’ve definitely had a little Hitler pee in my mouth. You just deal with it.
“
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Me, to my brother Chris, on the nature of nature and the fact that everything is made of poop. (via hammerito)
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hammerito:
Just talked to mom, told her she the sweetest.
You look like Hank Rollins in the video for “Liar”
hammerito:
I graduated college with this young lady.
Just… here. Go.
If religion can replace porn in her life, she’s not viewing the right porn. Might I kindly suggest starting at www.assmunc…….
